


5 times Bat was confused

by Kimmy



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Confusion, Falling In Love, M/M, Meet-Cute, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Secrets, Werewolves, do not copy to another site
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:54:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21941737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kimmy/pseuds/Kimmy
Summary: 5 times Bat was confused and 1 time he realized perfectly what was going on.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Bat Velasquez/Jace Wayland
Comments: 23
Kudos: 11





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Takara_Phoenix](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Takara_Phoenix/gifts).



> Merry Christmas, honey! They say it's 12 days of Christmas but you get 8 of them because 5+1 format (also, as you can see, this maths is peculiar.).

Jace was bored. This was the worst mission _ever_. Well, maybe the worst in the past three years, because the ravager fiasco was hard to beat. But it was just tedious, and a waste of time, and surely there was someone better for this, surely Jace would be more useful in more active combat. But he was assigned to deal with this, and he would. Which currently meant sitting in the cafe, bored out of mind, drinking coffee that was made mostly of sugar and wondering why couldn’t he at least have Alec with him.

The two demons hid in the abandoned old train station, and Jace needed to get them because there was the risk of them... breeding (ew!) except Jace _couldn’t_ get to them because the old train station was marked Seelie territory and yes, there were no Seelies there for like two decades now, but it was still “irresponsible” to barge into, even empty, enemy territory, and risk “diplomatic incident”.

So he sat there, and drank the weird pumpkin concoction the barista overly cheerfully recommended him, and eyed the door of the abandoned train station with contempt.

Today was going to be a long and boring day... 


	2. 1.

Bat was confused.

He’s only been in America for three days so far but confusion followed him around like a puppy and he wasn’t sure if this was the change or if America really was that weird. Technically, if they couldn’t even put the real prices in the shops, it must be them doing it wrong and not the rest of the world.

So yes, he was confused. Sue him.

Back home going out to eat would be a normal, everyday activity. It would not require a lot of processing power and wouldn’t make his head hurt. But here, it’s been five minutes now that he was standing in front of the funny screen and trying to figure out how to even approach the situation.

Starting with the fact ordering was happening on the screen. Yes, he had seen those before, of course, he did, but he always preferred a safe human interaction. Except here, there was no human. There was a girl at the counter but when he came up to her, she just blew a gum and pointed him at the screen. She didn’t have a cash register either so he had to accept she wouldn’t be any help.

Sighing, he mindlessly poked the buttons again, as if hoping the menu would magically start to make sense. Why would there be twenty coffees one item and surely, they couldn’t mean actual donuts as a burger bun, right? And what in the world was Ambrosia Salad? Why was it in the dessert section? Weren’t salads made of vegetables?

He knew he was probably making himself look weird but no one else needed to order so he had a right to take his time. Even if the cute guy at the window table kept giving him weird looks. He scrolled through the menu once again, desperately praying something will start to look normal, but even tea came in gallon jugs... and that was just wrong.

_Oh no_.

Bat panicked, trying to hurry up and magically order something when he saw the cute _cute_ guy stand up and go to stand behind him. Yeah, this was not making him nervous at all, between the pressure of someone in line behind him, unknown menu and the dude looking like a greek god - perfectly sculpted and like he could strike you down (or impregnate you) with just his gaze.

Bat stared at the donut burgers again, trying to figure out which one looked least disgusting but... oh god, was that frosting?

Someone cleared his throat and Bat turned to find the cute guy behind him giving him an artificially polite expression.

“Need help with that?”

Bat offered a smile he’s bee informed before was least annoying and ducked his head in embarrassment.

“Yeah, I only just moved here this week and I’m afraid I understand... little of this. Like... Why are the burgers made of donuts? And aren’t donuts sweet?”

The cute guy raised an eyebrow but he looked more amused than annoyed now so Bat counted that as a win. He leaned next to Bat (which did NOT make Bat feel out of breath) and did some magical swipes on the screen until blessedly normally looking burgers appeared.

“Oh my goodness, you’re a hero. Can you tell me why they sell coffee in twenties too?”

“Twenties?”

“Yeah, venti? I just want one cup, I...”

And then the guy laughed, real, free and uninhibited laugh, and Bat thought he looked a bit like an angel descended from heaven with his golden locks and beautiful face. That was going to be a problem.

“That’s just a thing, I don’t quite understand it either. That’s simply a large coffee.”

“Oh.” Bat blushed, suddenly embarrassed. “Well, how would I know. You sell tea in a gallon jug.”

“That’s iced tea.”

He showed Bat where to check his number and wait for his order then and proceeded to order his own coffee (a trenta, which was apparently also a size) and they waited together, with Bat doing his best to not stare, but not being able to keep himself from following the cute guy to his table and asking if he can sit with him. Smooth, Bat, real smooth.

But as much as the guy looked surprised, he agreed, and introduced himself (Jace, and wasn’t that such a unique name for a unique beauty?) and allowed Bat to drown him in his usual ramble, not really seeming too irritated. It was nice.

By the time Bat was done with his burger, Jace had drunk his coffee and had made a sudden and quick retreat, citing an emergency, but Bat didn’t let that discourage him. Maybe America wouldn’t be so bad.


	3. 2.

Bat was confused.

He and Jace run into each other in a club, and he was overjoyed about it, because he didn’t get to ask Jace for his number the last time, so this weird treatment made absolutely no sense.

“You can _see_ me?”

Bat thought they hit it off. He was sure that they got along and that Jace smiled at him and seriously? Pretending he didn’t know Bat now?

“I’m Bat? From the cafe? Guy forever confused by donut burgers?”

“No, it’s just... Of course I remember you... But I’m in a bit of a hurry and... How can you see me?”

“Of course I can see you! You’re standing right in front of me and it’s somewhat hard to miss that stupidly beautiful face of yours.”

And... it was hard to tell in the low lights of the club but Bat could swear he saw Jace blush.

“You think I’m beautiful?”

“More like carved out of marble by God himself but sure.” God, he needed to shut up right now. “Um... We didn’t really exchange numbers last time and like! I’m not hitting on you! Not that there’s anything wrong with it but just... you know. I thought we could stay in touch? As friends?”

Jace’s eyes were so wide Bat wondered if he saw a ghost so he just sighed and decided to fuck it.

“Here.” He reached for Jace’s pocket, stealing his phone and typing his number in, trying not to think of how close to Jace it put him. “Now you can text me if you want to.”

And then he winked, and left, and immediately run to find Maia to tell her he’s an idiot.

Maia was, unsurprisingly, unsympathetic.

But Maia was, also unsurprisingly, the voice of reason as always, and pointed out that as much as she was dying from second-hand embarrassment on Bat’s behalf (it really didn’t show), she couldn’t see what the problem was. Because if Jace didn’t want to see Bat again, he wouldn’t either way. But if he did want to... Well, all in all, the outcome was that Bat gave his phone number to a cute guy.

Things really could only get BETTER from there.


	4. 3.

Bat was confused.

Jace had texted him, and Bat texted back, and they have been writing back and forth for a few months now. They met a few times, at the same cafe, actually, which Bat kept frequenting despite their ridiculous and inhumane menu for absolutely different reasons than seeing Jace again. He even did it after Jace stopped showing up and that was not because of false hopes, no matter how much Maia teased him.

He even (eventually) texted Jace to ask why he’s no longer at the cafe (work, and now he’s moved on to another task) and they set up a few meetings, which turned to regular meetings, which was why Bat felt like it was okay to invite Jace back to his (admittedly humble) place.

And here Jace was. Looking uncomfortable and confused. That was definitely not the plan.

“Um...” Bat couldn’t have felt more awkward if he tried. “So what do you want to do? Watch a movie?”

Jace looked at Bat as if he didn’t understand.

“Why did you invite me here?”

Bat blinked, surprised by the question.

“Because I like to invite my friends to my shitty apartment and show them that I love them even if I don’t have many ways to spoil them?”

Jace was silent for a while, as if processing, mulling the words over. Bat let him. He didn’t seem to have a problem, he just looked... confused, and Bat found the implication quite sad, frankly.

“Is that what we are? Friends?”

Bat opened his mouth in shock.

“Duh! Of course we are! We hang out and text and I send you memes you pretend not to understand despite the fact I’m not buying it. Literally, who doesn’t know what yeet means, it’s 2019!”

“Well, I don’t.”

“You do _now_. So... movie?”

“Um... Sounds good? But you don’t seem to have a TV. Or a sofa, for the fact?”

Bat laughed.

“Yeah, I don’t, I’m poor. We can watch on my bed on my laptop?” He suddenly felt self-conscious. “Or if you’re uncomfortable with that, it’s fine. We can play cards on the bed or on the floor or we can go out. I don’t know. I’m sorry. I’m just kinda affectionate with all of my friends.”

“Affectionate?”

Jace looked really awkward sitting down on the bed and Bat definitely did not find it adorable.

“Dude, want me to be honest with you? Cause you look like, you totally need a hug. But no one ever gave you one.”

Jace’s silence spoke volumes so Bat did hug him then. And then they sat cuddled up together, laptop on their knees, watching a romantic comedy cause Bat was a fan. And if Jace’s head fit perfectly in the crook of his neck and he started reconsidering if he was right to tell Jace they were friends... Or just friends, at least... Well, Bat could live with that. And never, ever let Maia know, or she wouldn’t let him live it down.


	5. 4.

Bat was confused. 

He and Jace were doing great. They met up regularly, Jace visited Bat’s place a lot and they cuddled and snuggled progressively closer. Bat was thinking a lot about how to hint that he really wanted to take things to another level ever since he learned that Jace was pansexual, and everything was seemingly perfect.

Until Jace ghosted him.

Bat was wondering if he did something wrong at first when Jace didn’t show up to the cinema. He was sure Jace was just running late and would come in until the end of the ads but then Jace wasn’t there and Bat got increasingly more anxious. Then Jace didn’t come at all, didn’t call or text with an explanation, or answer Bat’s calls or texts... Bat checked the places they met up at and asked Maia if she saw him around and well. Bat was an idiot who didn’t know Jace’s address so he couldn’t do much more, and asking around... nobody seemed to know any Jace.

A week passed, then two weeks and Bat was starting to get ridiculously scared because Jace couldn’t be mad at him for so long without a word or a reason, right?

Something must have happened. Something wrong.

And Bat was going to find out what.

***

“Are you waking up? You look like you’re waking up. Do you remember anything?”

Did he... did he remember anything? He went to the docks because Maia said she had a friend who lived there who knew... Jace! Bat was looking for Jace and he went to the docks at night and then everything got fuzzy.

“What happened?”

“I’ll take that as a no. You were an idiot and went snooping where you shouldn’t. You’re a werewolf now. Yes, they’re real. Welcome to the madness.”

Bat’s eyes shot opened widened immediately... Only for him to find himself face to face with the most beautiful man he has ever seen... well, maybe besides Jace. Or well, equal to. Bat swallowed hard.

“What did you just say?”

Exactly what you think I did and I’m sorry. Hi! I’m Magnus and I’m a warlock. Yes, magic is real. So are vampires, faeries, werewolves, and you are one of them now. Also Shadowhunters but I don’t think you mundanes know what they are and they’re slimy anyway.”

“Werewolf. Cool. Cool cool. What the fuck is going on. I need to find Jace.”

Bat’s heart was beating like crazy and his head was spinning with what was real and what seemed like a bad prank show his grandma used to watch.

“Jace? Kinda short, muscular, blond hair, admittedly pretty face?”

Bat’s eyes lit up as he whipped around to look at Magnus again.

“Yes! You know him?”

Magnus scrunched his nose and oh no... That was completely adorable.

“I do. You know how I mentioned slimy Shadowhunters? He’s one of them.”

Well. That certainly didn’t sound like Jace ghosted him without a reason...


	6. 5.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the spirit of Bat's confusion, I got confused by the timey-wimey vortex otherwise known as that period between 24th December and January 6th and forgot to post.

Bat was confused.

He was also wet and hurting, and scared. And he didn’t know where Jace was. Going after Jace was not a plan. Well, not part of Magnus’ plan anyway. The whole Valentine kidnapping Jace thing was unexpected but Magnus and the weird tattooed guys claiming to be Jace’s family assured him they can work with that.

And Magnus was a perfect gentleman when he comforted Bat and Bat totally did not cry into his shoulder or have very inappropriate thoughts about his kidnapped not-boyfriend and sexy warlock and potential choices or lack thereof.

Which, ultimately, all did not stop Bat from sneaking out to the docks and landing himself in this situation. And okay, he found Jace. He was also now naked on the beach with a very bad aftertaste in his mouth. Being a wolf was handy for rescues but man, biting people was disgusting.

Someone coughed to his side and Bat crawled over to see Jace blink his eyes open.

“Bat?”

He didn’t really think before leaning in to kiss Jace.

***

Bat was sitting on a ridiculously comfortable sofa, Jace on its other end, both of them bundled up in blankets. The two of them stayed over at Magnus’ while Alec and Izzy promised to do... something about the entire mess before the two of them came around to be a problem for everyone to stare at (rude) but he was confused about the details and not necessarily interested. Maybe it was better this way. In a cozy loft with two of his favorite people (damn, did Magnus get on that list really fast) and away from the reminders of how much bigger this situation was.

For this moment, on this sofa, things were simple.

Well, as simple as they could be, Jace staring at him with an unreadable expression, only breaking to glance at Magnus sometimes, and an awkward silence between all three of them.

“Anyone wants a drink?”

Bat glared Magnus to sit back down before he could even leave the room.

“You know you’re not allowed to drink.”

They had a stare-off, Jace watching them with calculating gaze.

“So are you two like... a thing?”

Bat whipped his head around to stare at him (still getting used to the very distracting tattoos too).

“Me and Magnus? I literally just kissed you an hour ago.”

Jace blushed but ignored the statement.

“Well, right now you look like you really want to kiss _him_.”

Magnus looked between them, a bit lost and looking like he would rather be anywhere else before shyly raising a hand.

“I would not object to kissing. Or I could just leave the room.”

“Or I could admit Jace is right and I have the hots for both of you, and we could sit our asses down and talk like adults.”

“But... But you can’t be with two people at once, can you?”

Magnus’ smile seemed like a pretty good omen for the future of this potential relationship.

“Oh, Jace, for such a sexy angel, you’re a sweet summer child...”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look who remembered that this exists! oh good lord im so sorry XD here it is, a penultimate update!

For once, Bat was not confused.

It’s been a crazy last few months but despite the fact he was now a werewolf, it was some of the best months in his life. And well. Being able to turn into a bad wolf and kick ass was not necessarily a flaw, really. And yes, they were good months because no only did Bat get to keep Jace, love him and cuddle him and kiss that stupid surprised look of his face that Jace still got, but he also got his own second, fabulous boyfriend.

Magnus was unexpected, unpredictable and untamable, and when he was around Jace and Bat, he turned from a pouncing tiger into an adorable kitty demanding scratched behind his ears. Sure, he still had his (delightful) predatory and confident side, but he was caring, soft and deep down just as love-starved as Jace was. And Bat was here to love the fuck out of these two.

“Morning.”

“No.”

Well, there were also downsides, of course.

Moving into Magnus’ rent-free, huge, luxurious, self-cleaning loft? Fantastic. Getting to sleep on top of Jace, effectively keeping him in bed? Amazing. Jace still trying to go running at unfathomable ass o’clock in the morning despite the clear message Bat laying on him sent?

“No. Go the fuck to sleep before I spell it on you, Angel.”

“I gotta keep those abs pretty for you. Now, now. Off you go, Bat.”

Bat laughed.

“As if your abs need any more work.”

Magnus just hit Jace over the head, moving to lay on top of him next to Bat. Take that, even with your Shadowhunter strength.

Yes, this new life, with supernatural beings and magic and tearing down corrupt systems to rebuild them from the ground? It was crazy and busy and sometimes overwhelming.

But Bat would never change those lazy mornings for the world.

***

“Guys. Seriously. I need to go for my run.”

“No.”


End file.
